Where Have All The Blog Posts Gone? Part 1

I was originally planning to write this blog post on January 1st 2012.  As my posts have become so infrequent and sporatic over the past few months, I decided now was the best time to share with my friends, contest buddies and readers about the changes in my life as they are so large.

For the past seven years I have written about the joy, excitment and all round fun of the hobby of contesting in both my newsletters and this blog.  Occassionally, I blogged about other aspects of my life, but always in relation to the hobby (eg. A Brief History of ContestQueen.com).  I never shared my problems, challenges, obsticales or the dark side of my life, as I did not want to taint the hobby in any manner.

However, I think it’s time…

January 1st 2011, I wrote the following blog and posted it on my Lucky Yogini website.

Who Knew a Human Could Produce so Much Water?

I have not blogged in months. Why not? I’ve had this topic idea floating around since early December.

I was having Christmas tea with a good friend, CowboyYogi, and discussing the previous year. During our conversation I stated, “Who knew a human could produce so much water?” His reply was, “That would make a great blog post.”

So the idea swirled, and swirled, and swirled.

What took me so long to put pen to paper (so to speak)? Many reasons.

The Internet is a very very public place. Anything put here is here forever. (I think of the scene in Notting Hill where Julia Roberts, as Anna Scott says to Hugh Grant, as William Thacker, “You really don’t get it. This story gets filed. Every time anyone writes anything about me — they’ll dig up these photos. Newspapers last forever. I’ll regret this forever.”)

Speaking one’s truth isn’t easy. Fear is a very powerful and motivating emotion. (At the 2008 Annual National Sweepstakes Convention, after the big banquet luncheon, I was table hopping visiting friends. I always carry gemstones when I am in big crowds. At one particular table someone asked if I had any stones with me. I pulled them out of my pocket to reveal a piece of: smokey quartz, green aventurine, blue lace agate and kunzite. As the stones were passed around the table I was asked about the properties of each one. I said to the woman next to me, “The blue lace agate helps you speak your truth.” She promptly handed the stone back and said, “I could never do that.” WOW!)

Who cares? To test the waters before I wrote this post, I turned the topic into a speech and presented it at my local chapter of Toastmasters. I titled it “How Do You Do?” because everyone answers fine, even when it’s not and if you answered terrible, does the person who asked the question really care? I asked, “Why are we afraid to speak our truth?” I believe it’s because we are afraid of being judged, or worse, looking weak.

So, here’s my truth…

In everyone’s life a little rain must fall.

2010 was the worst year of my life. I had many challenges to overcome and they affected every aspect of my life: love, wealth and health.

Love: my marriage failed.
Wealth: our business failed and we declared bankruptcy.
Health: I was diagnosed as anaemic and borderline glucose intolerant.

I cried everyday for a year. Hence the title, who knew a human could produce so much water?

Thankfully, through the tears, taking one step at a time, each challenge was faced.

Love: due to the bankruptcy, we are still living in our home (thankfully!) giving us time to remain good parents and maintain our friendship. Once the finances have settled, I will be moving into a new home.

Wealth: the business is limping along as I liquidate inventory and figure out how to continue to follow my passion of teaching others how to find, organize, enter and win sweepstakes. I am in the process of finding full-time employment. (Can you help?)

Health: I began a vitamin regiment for the anaemia and began a daily yoga practice for the glucose intolerance. I have also improved my diet.

Some days are good, some days are bad and most are in between. I think that pretty much sums up most people’s lives.

New Year’s Eve, as I reflected on 2010 I found myself crying, once again, thinking about how much I had lost over the past year. Then I had a profound thought, “If I lost all of ‘this’, what have I just made room for?” I was suddenly excited at the prospect of what may come in,

& flowers don‘t grow without rain.

2013-01-06T15:10:00+00:00 December 10th, 2011|General|10 Comments

About the Author:

Carolyn

Carolyn Wilman (aka @ContestQueen) is a Digital Marketing Strategist and Sweepstakes Specialist. Carolyn teaches others how to Find, Organize, Enter and Win giveaways along with working with companies to create, and viral market, winning promotions maximizing ROI and loyal customers.

10 Comments

  1. Blessedta December 10, 2011 at 9:40 am - Reply

    Carolyn,

    Sorry sorry for all you lost this year. I pray that 2012 will bring you joy, happiness and most of all God’s grace and mercy.

    Stay blessed

  2. Sweepter December 10, 2011 at 11:18 am - Reply

    Divorce is a terrible thing. It takes years and years to get over. He will never be gone if there is a child — always part of your life. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck to you. Sorry for the many losses you have experienced as well as health problems.

  3. Mom December 10, 2011 at 12:16 pm - Reply

    Love you, Carolina !

  4. Carol M December 10, 2011 at 12:38 pm - Reply

    Carolyn – you are a good person and as we discussed many times in the past, life has its way of taking quirky and unexpected turns. It is all part of God’s plan for us. Knowing that I went through all that you are going through now (and wondering how I ever did it) I know that you will be fine and down the road you will look back just as I do now saying “What the hey?” and finding that you were just on the wrong road at the time. Listen to your heart and what your head is telling you, and you will be fine.

  5. Carolyn December 10, 2011 at 2:31 pm - Reply

    Hi Carolyn:
    Wow, these past days have been hard for you. And the anaemia is robbing you of energy no doubt. You are brave, courageous and giving. Wishing you abundant joy and delight with each new day. Hugs from your contest buddy in Ottawa.

  6. Nicole December 10, 2011 at 2:59 pm - Reply

    Hi Carolyn

    First, let me wish you and your family all the best for the holidays & the New Year!

    Though I don’t know you personally, I follow your blog, FB & website. I truly believe you do not have a real ounce of negitivity in you. Unfrotunately things that not gone as you hoped, wished and worked so hard for. These are not failures though. ‘Fail’ is such a harsh & negitive word to me. It didn’t go as hoped, it didn’t fail, it just didn’t work out as wanted. As you mention this opens up the opportunity for new possibilies. A new & different path than the one you thought you were going to travel on. This new path has little bumps & HUGE bumps along the way.

    I’m sure you have a great support system of friends & family. Now that support system is growing to your online friends!

    Best Wishes on your new path!

  7. Corkrose December 10, 2011 at 4:28 pm - Reply

    Congratulations! Yes, because you made it through a Hugh trial in your life. I wish you and the family peace and happiness and tons of prosperity in 2012. God bless and happy Christmas.

  8. Christina December 10, 2011 at 7:52 pm - Reply

    Hi Carolyn, This year will be better for you. I have a strong feeling about it, so be glad 2012 is almost here! Also, although these are severe life changes, you’re lucky that the health problems that you have can be alleviated through exercise and vitamins – it could be much worse, believe me, I know! (Once I got a three degree burn on my inner arm from spilling microwaved coffee on myself, in the shape of little potato, and hated it, and someone told me, Be glad the coffee didn’t scar your face! At the time that was little consolation, but now I look back and realize how true that was!) I’m sending you good energy, and good luck!

  9. Lucie Mewes December 11, 2011 at 4:34 am - Reply

    Oh my,

    I saw you on GMA and you changed my life: less GMA, more writing, a few contests & sweeps. And foodie blogs. And back in the kitchen.

    Just before I died I got a new liver last January. Exactly a year ago I went to Florida looking for one but Mayo said I was a bad risk and sent me home.

    We’ll see. I got one anyway, and at an age a friend considers way old I’m back.

    So, please let some of our not so hopeful pasts fade together and know that I hold hope for more cacti – less water – more peace and radiance in your path. Mine has been blessed by you.

    (I am struck by my timing in finding my new direction: Bakerella received a much-needed second new kidney this year, Jennie’s dear Mikey left life shockingly suddenly, and “I Made This” hasn’t since September.)

    Hmmm. Too much of my heart for public?

    • carolyn
      carolyn December 11, 2011 at 5:44 pm - Reply

      Thank you for sharing Lucie, I know my path has not been the toughest. I can’t even begin to imagine what you have been through. You are right, no matter what one’s journey there is always peace and radiance to be found. Thank you for blessing me back. (BTW, this is one of the best and most unexpected asspects of the hobby, the people.)

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